i seriously love readers digest. but i realized i was old the other day as i was reading it. i have been reading it forever, like since i was old enough to read (and it was safe because without a "sex and dating" column, i didn't have to anticipate my dad's "discussion" about the "sex and dating" topics). i realized i was old because i have started to pay attention to all the health, heart disease, diabetes articles that i used to skip because they were for the old people. i've always been in denial that its written for geezers and i sing its praises to everyone who cares (pretty much nobody) but i have finally decided to accept the truth, embrace the "studies show..." articles and try to learn more about (and not just eat) the benefits of avocados and how to sit and be fit.
i have always been amazed at rd's ability to bring me to tears and then get me gut laughing at some schmuck's stupid antics or some daily newspaper's misprint. oh boy, those things can crack me up. it is truly a great periodical that can bring you full circle in your emotions and brain function and leave you wanting more. (if i read people, i usually end up feeling ugly and disgusted with myself for caring about trash. i need the week between issues to recover.)
but the day readers digest arrives at our house is like Christmas. and for a whole week (i used to be able to finish an issue in a couple hours but kids and family fixed that right up for me) my stomach tingles with excitement. sometimes i forget why i'm excited and then i remember! um, ted, i have to use the bathroom. i'll be right back. and I get two minutes of uninterrupted reading (the perfect amount of time for rd)
then this: (enter maya) maya go find daddy. no this is mommy's. i know it's little and has a ton of cat litter ads, but mommy is trying to read this right now. maya go see if daddy needs help. maya mommy needs some privacy. please. maya. please.
and then my rd disappears with my daughter into the other room. she thinks because it's small it's for her. i might have to start buying the large print edition. (so much of it makes so much more sense now).
oh well, my legs are usually asleep by then anyways.
ps. when seventeen magazine did a "sex and dating" on oral sex, i hid it from my dad. i'm sure you understand.
i have always been amazed at rd's ability to bring me to tears and then get me gut laughing at some schmuck's stupid antics or some daily newspaper's misprint. oh boy, those things can crack me up. it is truly a great periodical that can bring you full circle in your emotions and brain function and leave you wanting more. (if i read people, i usually end up feeling ugly and disgusted with myself for caring about trash. i need the week between issues to recover.)
but the day readers digest arrives at our house is like Christmas. and for a whole week (i used to be able to finish an issue in a couple hours but kids and family fixed that right up for me) my stomach tingles with excitement. sometimes i forget why i'm excited and then i remember! um, ted, i have to use the bathroom. i'll be right back. and I get two minutes of uninterrupted reading (the perfect amount of time for rd)
then this: (enter maya) maya go find daddy. no this is mommy's. i know it's little and has a ton of cat litter ads, but mommy is trying to read this right now. maya go see if daddy needs help. maya mommy needs some privacy. please. maya. please.
and then my rd disappears with my daughter into the other room. she thinks because it's small it's for her. i might have to start buying the large print edition. (so much of it makes so much more sense now).
oh well, my legs are usually asleep by then anyways.
ps. when seventeen magazine did a "sex and dating" on oral sex, i hid it from my dad. i'm sure you understand.
3 comments:
Every time I read the Reader's Digest it reminds me of you and me fighting over the Drama in Real Life section. Where did that one go? I miss it. And yes, it does take considerably longer to get through a RD issue than it used to.
i always think of laying on your living room floor and telling you that you should read the whole magazine becuase there are funny jokes at the end of every story and you being blown away that you've been missing out!
before we where married and i lived at my grandmothers house your dad would lay on her couch on sunday afternoons after church and read rd from cover to cover. i had my doubts it his guy knew how to have fun!but hey what can i say- 32 years later and counting!
Post a Comment